I have two homes: California and Hawai'i. I know that a very small, double occupancy room in a dormitory is nowhere near a "house" or "home", but it's my home. Calling it that, makes it more homier that saying my dorm... Simply because I'll spending 9 months living here. It's like renting an apartment. That's someone's home, even if they don't own it.
I have a close knit of friends, true friends. I made a huge move here, I knew no one, I didn't know the area (I'd only been to the Big Island), I had no idea how to pronounce a lot of Hawai'ian words... Yet now, it's different. We take care of each other, we support each other, and just have fun together.
These people are most of who are in my family. This is part of what we do. We sit in the hallway (that's circular, btw) and sing at 1am. We talk. We listen. We hug. We kiss. It's my home away from home. My family away from family. And I love them.
I don't like my history and math classes. I'm not as skinny as I used to be. I'm insecure about my body and looks. I miss having a car. I've had my heart broken. I'm not made of money. I live half an ocean and a 5 hour plane ride from those I love.
.....
But I love those I hold close to me. My friends & family.
Because I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn. And we are led to those who help us most to grow if we let them, and we help them in return. Well, I don't know if I believe that's true, but I know I'm who I am today because of them.
it doesn't mean much it doesn't mean anything at all the life I've left behind me is a cold room I've crossed the last line from where I can't return where every step I took in faith betrayed me and led me from my home
and sweet sweet surrender is all that I have to give
you take me in no questions asked you strip away the ugliness that surrounds me are you an angel am I already that gone I only hope that I won't disappoint you when I'm down here on my knees
and sweet sweet sweet surrender is all that I have to give
sweet sweet sweet surrender is all that I have to give
and I don't understand by the touch of your hand I would be the one to fall
I miss the little things oh I miss everything
it doesn't mean much it doesn't mean anything at all the life I left behind me is a cold room
I need money. College life is going to be expensive... It already is. I only wish I could have an apartment or something. I have suuuuuch a vision for what my first apartment will look like. It's ridiculous.
Today was the first day I dressed up for homecoming week. You don't get the full effect, because I did have a wig that I wore... Picture Vince Neil and 80s Bon Jovi.
So my fears of not getting accepted into any colleges I applied to has just been nullified....
I logged into my San Diego State University App. Check online and this is what I read:
Congratulations ! You have been granted admission to San Diego State University for the fall 2005 semester. An admission letter and an Intent to Enroll form have been mailed to you. Please verify that the address listed above is correct. If incorrect, please visit Change of Address to provide us with your new address. It is important that you keep your address current with the Office of Admissions. Other campus departments will use the address on file to communicate with you.
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amourmoi's journal
